The waiting game…

She’s your girl.

You love her.

This is new to you so you ask your friends for advice. They tell you to have sex with her.

You eventually agree with them that you two should want to, but she’s not ready.

You try to do it anyway and she repeatedly stops you.

You seek that connection and elevate it above all that came before; how she made you feel when she first spoke to you, how your heart skipped when she sent a message.

You think that sex is your right and that you deserve it from her.

You become frustrated that after all the feelings you’ve shared, that she doesn’t share this one – this important one.

You’re forgetting why you two worked so well to begin with. How she made you feel for the first time.

The desire for sex has driven a wedge between the two of you.

The pressure from friends to be ready and forcing that on your partner is wrong.

 
Remember why relationships work. Remember it’s about mutual respect. Remember it’s about adhering to agreed boundaries and parameters. Remember it’s about love.

We move at different speeds, and that’s OK.

Her wanting to wait could be a good thing. She takes you seriously and wants sex to be magical, not mechanical.

If in doubt, talk to the only other person that matters in this.  Share your vulnerability. Give more and you’ll get more in return.

Sex is meant to matter. It can create life or death. Take it seriously. Take her seriously.

Seek advice, by all means, but be sure to talk to the right people. Realise that they may not always be your friends.

And, most importantly, talk to her.